1. I hate television. Especially American television. Except "Whose Line Is It Anyway". And "House". But I hate Christmas more.

2. People who don't read newspapers or watch/listen to the news scare me.

3. I don't really like children. Especially mine.

4. I don't suffer fools, morons and idiots, or showy flashy shallow people gladly, in fact I don't suffer them at all. Long walk, short pier. Just do it.

5. I'm a hermit; I seldom see anyone and I never go out to social occasions.

6. I'm scared of the dark. Both my children were conceived in the dark; I think that's probably why I don't like them very much (refer #3).

7. I seldom say what I mean and I seldom mean what I say. Or do I...

8. My life is spent in isolation on the internet and let me tell you, it's really hard squeezing a big blimp body down that skinny little ethernet cable. Getting through the router isn't much fun, either.

9. Multiple sclerosis won't kill me; I'll do that for myself when both me and the coffin are ready. (Must get on with designing that big white box).

10. I want to be a cat in my next life, with wings. That'll really fuck the birds.

12. My blog is the most interesting uninteresting thing on the 'net.

12. I can't count.