Im not in one of those moods. Its not a pretty typical post-MS-collapse mood.

Its a Clayton's mood; the mood you are having when you aren't having a mood.

I cooked a yummy dinner tonight of sweet and sour chicken, over rice with corn and spring onions (I know you were dying to know that, just proving that I actually CAN cook real food, ok?) and was playing computer games with Adam shortly afterwards when I realised suddenly that I was unable to stay upright and would shortly pitch face down on the floor if I didn't get horizonal asap.

So, I got horizontal, asap.

I was half asleep before I hit the bed and couldn't even roll over to grab the puppy, let alone hoist her fat arse up and out I went. Bang.

Now, see that? First bang in months and I slept through it, I must be sick... anyway, what seemed like minutes, but was in reality the best part of an hour later, Adam came in and woke me up to see if I was all right. So we went to the dairy for smokes. Then we ate the last pack of Girl Guide biscuits. The mini-choc ones.

Four hours later, the chocolate has failed to put me to sleep and Im still awake with an aching tooth (gotta get that eye dropper and clove oil out soon), one leg in a bonfire and the other playing host to a squirming worm farm whilst they twitch in unison and a bloody sore finger where I carved a chunk out on a display basket full of cones of cotton in a shop at Greerton yesterday afternoon. I got a nice set of rubber car mats for $11, though.

Ok, too much information; I guess you didn't really need to know about the tooth.

So, in this mood that Im not having, Ive been thinking about the unutterable injustice of life. Its just not bloody fair.

Just for once, just once, Id like to have the WHOLE packet of mini-choc Girl Guide biscuits all to myself.

Is that too much to ask? Is it?

Bah.

One day a little five year old girl excitedly approached her mother and announced that she had learned how you get a baby.

The mother was amused and said, "Oh really sweetie, why don't you tell me all about it?" The little girl then explained, "Well, the mommy and daddy take off all of their clothes, and the daddy's wiener stands way up high, and the mommy kneels on the floor and puts the daddy's wiener in her mouth, and then the daddy's wiener sort of explodes and makes sticky juice into the mommy's mouth, and then the mommy swallows the sticky juice, and that's how you get a baby."

The mother looked lovingly at her daughter, leaned over to meet her eye to eye and said, "Oh honey, that's sweet, but that's not how you get a baby. That's how you get
jewellery."