Fig is one of those words people use without ever thinking of its ancestry; phrases like "Couldn't give a fig". Canada had a folk music band from Newfoundland call Figgy Duff. At Christmes time, carols exhort us to "bring us some figgy pudding" and people eat dried figs from the supermarket and fresh figs off their trees. As a noun, it refers to dress or adornment; as a verb, to adorn or embellish.

In Shakespeare's day it meant something entirely different, it was a euphemism for 'cunt'.

These days, Wiki suggests doing stuff with figs has more sexual connotations than Shakespeare ever gave it. Nasssty ones much enjoyed by those more interested in what goes into their anus than what comes out of it. In fact, it gives a whole new meaning to "in one end and out the other".

So when Flattie starts cracking up and sending links to sites with links to stories about figging and ginger, well the advertising you find alongside them is even funnier than these weirdoes taking themselves so seriously.

Advertisements like this one for The Rider Rocker Fucking Ball.



You can also buy Bondage Gear, ElectroSex Gear, Dildos & Insertables, Vibrating Sex Toys, Cock and Ball Toys, Fucking Machines, Chastity Devices, Strap Ons, Nipple Toys, Mouth Gags, Remote Sex Toys (remote sex toys???), Enema Devices, Bondage Furniture, Hoods and Muzzles, Fetish Clothing, Penis Pumps, Floggers & Whips, Breast/Nipple Pumps, Medical Toys, Fetish Books and Lubes & Creams at that site.

I think some people might be getting more than figgy pudding in their stockings THIS Christmas.

Well, cunturatively speaking, anyway.