:: Monday, February 28, 2005
bummer
I got turned down for the Grim Reapers job.
They said I was too short. Oh, and that as I can't walk very far it might make fulfilling my quota a little difficult.
Muahaaaahaaaaahaaaaaa
Shit I'm bored.
And my head hurts. I think someone parked their scythe in it. 
They said I was too short. Oh, and that as I can't walk very far it might make fulfilling my quota a little difficult.
Muahaaaahaaaaahaaaaaa
Shit I'm bored.
And my head hurts. I think someone parked their scythe in it.
:: Sunday, February 27, 2005
Needles and pins
I have that headache back again. Only this time it's in my eye as well.
I hope this isn't the beginning of optic neuritis again... cos that would mean an exacerbation coming and I'm scared of those.
I always seem to come off worst, for some reason.
I wonder why that is?
"And I knew I had to run away and get down on my knees and pray that they go away.
Still it begins, needles and pins..."
The Ramones
I hope this isn't the beginning of optic neuritis again... cos that would mean an exacerbation coming and I'm scared of those.
I always seem to come off worst, for some reason.
I wonder why that is?
"And I knew I had to run away and get down on my knees and pray that they go away.
Still it begins, needles and pins..."
The Ramones
:: Saturday, February 26, 2005
A bit simplistic, but
I was just sitting in the dark in the lounge watching the moon and getting trashed (as ya do) and thinking "Geez this world is so fucked up".
No, seriously. I was.
And I was thinking how the Big Power whoever and wherever He/She/It/They may be has a nasty sense of humour as well. Maybe God really IS a woman and she has PMS or something, but think about this for a minute, ok? It won't take long, I have the concentration of a gnat.
On one side of the Indian Ocean you have Somalia - one of more distressed of the dry, starving and barren African nations struggling under the yoke of political oppression, and on the other you have countries like Indonesia and Thailand, both who know the pain of living under the yoke of political oppression. To the North and North West you have Bangladesh, India and Sri Lanka, who spend lots of time bickering over who is going to do the political oppressing. Then God has a hissy fit and stomps in a puddle and kills 250,000 politically oppressed and very poor people.
And a few thousand tourists, just for good measure. Some of those tourists took this picture - one of an amazing set which flashed around the world today after the retrieval of some digital images from the camera owned by John and Jackie Knill, a Canadian couple who perished in Thailand on Boxing Day 2004.
Is it political oppression, or is it people that God dislikes so much cos She is really pissed at someone.
Nature went and flexed her muscles again and showed her ants how powerless we are with all our arrogance and complacency born of knowledge and technology. But, while technology could not save them, it could record the final moments of the end of the world as they knew it.
And I think that is pretty amazing.
Maybe God is part of the Vogon Constructor Fleet. That would account for Sam Hunt's poetry as well.
OK, you can stop thinking now; your minute is up.
No, seriously. I was.
And I was thinking how the Big Power whoever and wherever He/She/It/They may be has a nasty sense of humour as well. Maybe God really IS a woman and she has PMS or something, but think about this for a minute, ok? It won't take long, I have the concentration of a gnat.
On one side of the Indian Ocean you have Somalia - one of more distressed of the dry, starving and barren African nations struggling under the yoke of political oppression, and on the other you have countries like Indonesia and Thailand, both who know the pain of living under the yoke of political oppression. To the North and North West you have Bangladesh, India and Sri Lanka, who spend lots of time bickering over who is going to do the political oppressing. Then God has a hissy fit and stomps in a puddle and kills 250,000 politically oppressed and very poor people.
And a few thousand tourists, just for good measure. Some of those tourists took this picture - one of an amazing set which flashed around the world today after the retrieval of some digital images from the camera owned by John and Jackie Knill, a Canadian couple who perished in Thailand on Boxing Day 2004.
Is it political oppression, or is it people that God dislikes so much cos She is really pissed at someone.
Nature went and flexed her muscles again and showed her ants how powerless we are with all our arrogance and complacency born of knowledge and technology. But, while technology could not save them, it could record the final moments of the end of the world as they knew it.
And I think that is pretty amazing.
Maybe God is part of the Vogon Constructor Fleet. That would account for Sam Hunt's poetry as well.
OK, you can stop thinking now; your minute is up.
:: Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Used up
I used to love my job.
I used to have great respect for my friend who was my Boss.
Mind you, I used to be fertile as well.
The solution to all these used-tos is the same - application of some small and very sharp cutting device.
Get ya knife out, its Ablation Time :-)
Main Entry: ab·late
Pronunciation: a-'blAt
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Forms: ab·lat·ed; ab·lat·ing, ablates
: to remove or destroy the function of. to remove especially by cutting
Geez, that sounds like a bit of me, dunnit! I knew there was a reason why I bought that set of knives last shopping night.
"...so if you give 'em a quick short,sharp, shock,
they won't do it again. Dig it? "
Pink Floyd - Us and Them.
I used to have great respect for my friend who was my Boss.
Mind you, I used to be fertile as well.
The solution to all these used-tos is the same - application of some small and very sharp cutting device.
Get ya knife out, its Ablation Time :-)
Main Entry: ab·late
Pronunciation: a-'blAt
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Forms: ab·lat·ed; ab·lat·ing, ablates
: to remove or destroy the function of. to remove especially by cutting
Geez, that sounds like a bit of me, dunnit! I knew there was a reason why I bought that set of knives last shopping night.
"...so if you give 'em a quick short,sharp, shock,
they won't do it again. Dig it? "
Pink Floyd - Us and Them.
:: Monday, February 21, 2005
Blossom time
Many, many moons ago, my Mum bought a Lotus plant. Back then, in the late 70's or so, they were scarcer than hens teeth, although now you can buy them in garden centres etc.
Anyway, the lotus Mum had lived in a 15 foot diameter 18 inch deep pond and was something amazing to behold when it was in full bloom - 10, 20, 50, 100 dancing, dipping, nodding pink blooms. It was also an amazing sight watching one of the horses dump Raewyn on her arse in the lotus pond as well, but that's a whole other story. But amazement aside, for 25 years, the offshoots of that original lotus plant have been kept alive - in a bucket, in a trough, in a pond, and now in a piece Rae took off her treasured one and planted in my copper in the front garden. Its only been there a few months and started out as one small piece of tuber with a growing tip, but today it flowered for the first time - one single, perfect lotus bloom.
The kids think its cool, and Im just rapt. Bet Mum is, too, wherever she is :-)
Wouldn't you be?
Anyway, the lotus Mum had lived in a 15 foot diameter 18 inch deep pond and was something amazing to behold when it was in full bloom - 10, 20, 50, 100 dancing, dipping, nodding pink blooms. It was also an amazing sight watching one of the horses dump Raewyn on her arse in the lotus pond as well, but that's a whole other story. But amazement aside, for 25 years, the offshoots of that original lotus plant have been kept alive - in a bucket, in a trough, in a pond, and now in a piece Rae took off her treasured one and planted in my copper in the front garden. Its only been there a few months and started out as one small piece of tuber with a growing tip, but today it flowered for the first time - one single, perfect lotus bloom.
The kids think its cool, and Im just rapt. Bet Mum is, too, wherever she is :-)
Wouldn't you be?
:: Sunday, February 20, 2005
:-(
Oh my head hurts. I've been overdoing the "sorting out my shit" er shit. And cleaning up after Rae cutting the cherry tree down. Yayyy, no more birds crapping all over my car. No more berry stems stuck under the windscreen wipers. No more pink measles petals stuck all over my car.
I miss that tree already.
So, I feel really, really ill right now and shit my head hurts :-(
Its enough to drive you insane. Insane enough to do this quiz. I told you I was ill, didn't I?
Im this bloke here, The 6th Chuck of France...
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.
...speaking of chuck...
I miss that tree already.
So, I feel really, really ill right now and shit my head hurts :-(
Its enough to drive you insane. Insane enough to do this quiz. I told you I was ill, didn't I?
Im this bloke here, The 6th Chuck of France...
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.
...speaking of chuck...
:: Friday, February 18, 2005
Spot
the Deja Vu
:-)
The orange people have done it now
Run off to Label Heaven
Their fruit are wearing stickers saying
"Sunkist 3107"
:-)
The orange people have done it now
Run off to Label Heaven
Their fruit are wearing stickers saying
"Sunkist 3107"
:: Wednesday, February 16, 2005
staying out of trouble
One of the best things about the internet is the absolutely vast volume of things to read about. You name it, there's going to be something, somewhere, written by someone about it; and the finding of it will lead you down weird and wacky paths during your search.
I just like the fact that I can read my favourite magazine online. Of course, once you get inside a site like that, the links are endless.
Hehe, here's another one of those damn quiz sites. Go hard.
FYI - Im a Chunder Monkey.
What Kind of Drunk Are You?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey
Kewl, huh.
I just like the fact that I can read my favourite magazine online. Of course, once you get inside a site like that, the links are endless.
Hehe, here's another one of those damn quiz sites. Go hard.
FYI - Im a Chunder Monkey.
What Kind of Drunk Are You?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey
Kewl, huh.
:: Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Steptoe and Grandson
Adam has been living in the same house as his grandfather too long.
Seriously.
All my life, any time Reg went out somewhere, there was a good chance that when he got home the words "Look what I picked up on the road" were going to be heard. He still does it. He has brought home all sorts of items over the years. Now Adam is doing the same.
At first it was just little things like a ball he found in the gutter, or a broken centreline cats-eye that had come loose. We have bits of rock floating around the house, and shells and vegetation from the beach. Its common for him to leave the supermarket with recipe leaflets clutched in his fist as though they were gold. But today he really outdid himself.
Today he went off down the park after school to watch the tree trimmers cut and mulch the trees down there. And he came home with a full truckload of wood chips.
I shit you not - there are a couple of cubic metres of bloody woodchips on my front lawn, which will be great for the gardens now the weedspray has done its thing.
I just hope the chips don't heat up and catch fire. But think about it; if this is what he collars at 11, what's he going to be like at 14 or 16?
At least Heather only rummages in the clothing bins after school. I wonder if teaching her to say "bargains, bubby, bargains" when she was a year old has anything to do with it?
Bloody kids, eh...
Seriously.
All my life, any time Reg went out somewhere, there was a good chance that when he got home the words "Look what I picked up on the road" were going to be heard. He still does it. He has brought home all sorts of items over the years. Now Adam is doing the same.
At first it was just little things like a ball he found in the gutter, or a broken centreline cats-eye that had come loose. We have bits of rock floating around the house, and shells and vegetation from the beach. Its common for him to leave the supermarket with recipe leaflets clutched in his fist as though they were gold. But today he really outdid himself.
Today he went off down the park after school to watch the tree trimmers cut and mulch the trees down there. And he came home with a full truckload of wood chips.
I shit you not - there are a couple of cubic metres of bloody woodchips on my front lawn, which will be great for the gardens now the weedspray has done its thing.
I just hope the chips don't heat up and catch fire. But think about it; if this is what he collars at 11, what's he going to be like at 14 or 16?
At least Heather only rummages in the clothing bins after school. I wonder if teaching her to say "bargains, bubby, bargains" when she was a year old has anything to do with it?
Bloody kids, eh...
:: Monday, February 14, 2005
A fine romance
Yahhoooooo the tills are ringing, the lovers are a'trembling in anticipation, people will laugh with joy, others will cry with misery. Some will promise eternal love and others will wake up and smell the coffee and realise that all ain't what it oughta be in the Garden of Lurrrve.
Yes, it's St Valentines Day.
If you thought St Valentine's Day was all about love, you'd be wrong; its about money . I walked through the supermarket the other morning and saw all these fancy schmancy gift packs and red hearts and wrapping paper and bows and I thought... "awww fuck that, what a load of bollocks".
I mean, seriously...suddenly on one day of the year everyone loves their significant other enough to do something special for them? Spend money on them? Appreciate them? What happened to the other 364.25 days?
Or is it the one day of the year that hiding the truth becomes too hard to handle? When you realise that what you feel, and what you are supposed to feel are two completely different things?
In this frenzied, culturally-created romantic fervour they've sucked the clueless, the uninmaginative into paying through the nose for some coronary-organ shaped chocolates clad in red foil in a shiny cellophane-wrapped box that tastes no different from the pick'n'mix chocolates further down the aisle. Don't forget to add the long stemmed red roses at a million bucks a pop, throw in a smaltzy card expressing undying love and tie it all up in fancy paper with hearts all over it and 50 metres of fine red ribbon.
Does it shout out "I love you!!" with vehemence? Or does it screech "Im so tacky I have to fall for this crap" instead?
And yes, the tills really ARE ringing - according to the news, Joe Public this year could spend as much as $9 million on flowers alone for V-Day. Considering New Zealand spends $150 million annually on flowers, its a big chunk of cash, although at $120/doz for special long stemmed reddies its hardly surprising, huh.
Isn't romance about surprise? Thoughfulness for its own sake? What's so bloody romantic about falling in with being told that today is the day to make yourself look like a complete twang?
I ain't never falling for this shit.
What a c r o c k.
Yes, it's St Valentines Day.
If you thought St Valentine's Day was all about love, you'd be wrong; its about money . I walked through the supermarket the other morning and saw all these fancy schmancy gift packs and red hearts and wrapping paper and bows and I thought... "awww fuck that, what a load of bollocks".
I mean, seriously...suddenly on one day of the year everyone loves their significant other enough to do something special for them? Spend money on them? Appreciate them? What happened to the other 364.25 days?
Or is it the one day of the year that hiding the truth becomes too hard to handle? When you realise that what you feel, and what you are supposed to feel are two completely different things?
In this frenzied, culturally-created romantic fervour they've sucked the clueless, the uninmaginative into paying through the nose for some coronary-organ shaped chocolates clad in red foil in a shiny cellophane-wrapped box that tastes no different from the pick'n'mix chocolates further down the aisle. Don't forget to add the long stemmed red roses at a million bucks a pop, throw in a smaltzy card expressing undying love and tie it all up in fancy paper with hearts all over it and 50 metres of fine red ribbon.
Does it shout out "I love you!!" with vehemence? Or does it screech "Im so tacky I have to fall for this crap" instead?
And yes, the tills really ARE ringing - according to the news, Joe Public this year could spend as much as $9 million on flowers alone for V-Day. Considering New Zealand spends $150 million annually on flowers, its a big chunk of cash, although at $120/doz for special long stemmed reddies its hardly surprising, huh.
Isn't romance about surprise? Thoughfulness for its own sake? What's so bloody romantic about falling in with being told that today is the day to make yourself look like a complete twang?
I ain't never falling for this shit.
What a c r o c k.
:: Sunday, February 13, 2005
ascii panda-ring
All there in black and white
:: Saturday, February 12, 2005
newsgroups for dummies
How many e-mail group members does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
53 to flame the spell checkers
41 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...
another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"
109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group
203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped
111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group
306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty
27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's which make light bulbs relevant to this group
33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ
44 to ask what is a "FAQ"
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again...
THIS is what makes the world go around... these people!
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
53 to flame the spell checkers
41 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...
another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"
109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group
203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped
111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group
306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty
27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's which make light bulbs relevant to this group
33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ
44 to ask what is a "FAQ"
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again...
THIS is what makes the world go around... these people!
:: Friday, February 11, 2005
Old mail
A Northern Territory farmhand radios back to the farm manager.
"Boss, I gotta helluva problem here. I hit a pig with the ute. The pig's OK, but he's stuck in the bullbars at the front of my ute and is wriggling and squealing so much I can't get him out."
The manager says "Ok, there's a 303 behind the seat. Take it, shoot the pig in the head and you'll be able to remove him."
Five minutes later the farm hand calls back. "I did what you said boss. Took the 303, shot the pig in the head and removed him from the bull-bars. No problem there, but I still can't go on".
"Now what's the f*****g problem?" raged the manager.
"Well boss, it's his motor-bike. The flashing blue light is stuck under the right-front wheel arch".
"Boss, I gotta helluva problem here. I hit a pig with the ute. The pig's OK, but he's stuck in the bullbars at the front of my ute and is wriggling and squealing so much I can't get him out."
The manager says "Ok, there's a 303 behind the seat. Take it, shoot the pig in the head and you'll be able to remove him."
Five minutes later the farm hand calls back. "I did what you said boss. Took the 303, shot the pig in the head and removed him from the bull-bars. No problem there, but I still can't go on".
"Now what's the f*****g problem?" raged the manager.
"Well boss, it's his motor-bike. The flashing blue light is stuck under the right-front wheel arch".
:: Thursday, February 10, 2005
But who is counting
48 hours.
48 hours since I last had a cigarette and I haven't killed anyone yet.
Not quite...
This heat is killing me. Seriously. Im all coming apart in the middle. I mean, listen to this. I joke lots about forgetting what my name is, right? But this afternoon I seriously DID forget what my name was. I had the mother of all "word" moments. What's that? Yes, I know, it wouldn't have even happened if I hadn't been thinking about myself. Thank you.
The wobbly hands and the shonky balance might be better after Debbie's ministrations this morning. I don't like all that oversteering when I walk. It tends to make me think there is something not quite normal about me.
But I think its the worms crawling inside my left foot that piss me off and stress me out the most. Im heavily not into worms, ok? I'm gonna be cremated and beat the little bastards to it. What do you mean, other people don't have worms crawling inside their foot and a the barbie burning in the leg above? Ok, then if we just change the worms to King Prawns, we got these munchies covered.
FIGJAM
They could have said it like this #451: "Every silver lining comes with its own cloud".
48 hours since I last had a cigarette and I haven't killed anyone yet.
Not quite...
This heat is killing me. Seriously. Im all coming apart in the middle. I mean, listen to this. I joke lots about forgetting what my name is, right? But this afternoon I seriously DID forget what my name was. I had the mother of all "word" moments. What's that? Yes, I know, it wouldn't have even happened if I hadn't been thinking about myself. Thank you.
The wobbly hands and the shonky balance might be better after Debbie's ministrations this morning. I don't like all that oversteering when I walk. It tends to make me think there is something not quite normal about me.
But I think its the worms crawling inside my left foot that piss me off and stress me out the most. Im heavily not into worms, ok? I'm gonna be cremated and beat the little bastards to it. What do you mean, other people don't have worms crawling inside their foot and a the barbie burning in the leg above? Ok, then if we just change the worms to King Prawns, we got these munchies covered.
FIGJAM
They could have said it like this #451: "Every silver lining comes with its own cloud".
:: Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Im tired
Im tired of stuff, you know?
Im tired of being stuffed around.
Im wandering loose and aimless again and I don't know what to do and I dont like that, either.
More worry, more stress, more MS, less sleep, less money, quit smoking, more worry....
Ahhhhhh BOLLOCKS
Im tired of being stuffed around.
Im wandering loose and aimless again and I don't know what to do and I dont like that, either.
More worry, more stress, more MS, less sleep, less money, quit smoking, more worry....
Ahhhhhh BOLLOCKS
:: Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Nut hurtin' no one
If ya gotta subscribe to online horoscope sites, give this lady a whirl.
Hers are always so on the button, in a silly disbelieving kinda way *cocks one eyebrow*
Anyway, here is mine for this week.
"When the Strength card comes up in your readings, it can
represent the need for you to show courage in the face of
adversity and, more importantly, the courage and strength
to be true to yourself.
How easy it is for us to submit to our weaker nature and to
accept the unacceptable or to behave in a cowardly way and
refuse to stand up for what we believe is right or for what
we rightly deserve.
This card represents courage, willpower, mental strength
and self-belief, and it often appears when we are feeling
fearful or afraid of standing up for ourselves. Whatever
challenges you may have to face when this card appears, you
must draw on your own inner strength and courage to deal
with them.
It is a signal to ignore your insecurities and self-doubt
and also to fight back against any aggressors or oppressors
in your life, not physically, but with strength of
character and integrity.
Whether you are dealing with a lover or partner who bullies
or dominates you, going to your employer to say you are
being undervalued and are worth more, or refusing to be
tempted into behavior that you feel uncomfortable with
morally, you can harness your own inner courage and
strength to overcome such issues if you put your mind to it.
The Strength card is about proving yourself by improving
your own sense of self-esteem and self-worth.
Assertiveness, confidence and proactive action are all good
signs of harnessing your own strength and courage.
Cowardice, loss of nerve and inertia are signs that you are
yet to find that courage.
I was once told that the letters in the word FEAR stand for
‘False Evidence Appearing Real’, and the fact is that most
of what we fear never ever happens.
Look for the hero inside yourself when the Strength card
appears."
Now THAT'S fucking spooky...
muuuuaaaaahaaaaahaaaaaaaa
Hers are always so on the button, in a silly disbelieving kinda way *cocks one eyebrow*
Anyway, here is mine for this week.
"When the Strength card comes up in your readings, it can
represent the need for you to show courage in the face of
adversity and, more importantly, the courage and strength
to be true to yourself.
How easy it is for us to submit to our weaker nature and to
accept the unacceptable or to behave in a cowardly way and
refuse to stand up for what we believe is right or for what
we rightly deserve.
This card represents courage, willpower, mental strength
and self-belief, and it often appears when we are feeling
fearful or afraid of standing up for ourselves. Whatever
challenges you may have to face when this card appears, you
must draw on your own inner strength and courage to deal
with them.
It is a signal to ignore your insecurities and self-doubt
and also to fight back against any aggressors or oppressors
in your life, not physically, but with strength of
character and integrity.
Whether you are dealing with a lover or partner who bullies
or dominates you, going to your employer to say you are
being undervalued and are worth more, or refusing to be
tempted into behavior that you feel uncomfortable with
morally, you can harness your own inner courage and
strength to overcome such issues if you put your mind to it.
The Strength card is about proving yourself by improving
your own sense of self-esteem and self-worth.
Assertiveness, confidence and proactive action are all good
signs of harnessing your own strength and courage.
Cowardice, loss of nerve and inertia are signs that you are
yet to find that courage.
I was once told that the letters in the word FEAR stand for
‘False Evidence Appearing Real’, and the fact is that most
of what we fear never ever happens.
Look for the hero inside yourself when the Strength card
appears."
Now THAT'S fucking spooky...
muuuuaaaaahaaaaahaaaaaaaa
:: Monday, February 07, 2005
Not terribly PC, you understand...
UNIT MATHS EXAM (AMENDED FOR OTARA HIGH SCHOOL)
Name:__________________ Gang:__________________
Question One:
Ofa has an AK-47 with a 40 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive-by shootings can he attend before he has to reload?
Question Two:
Setu has 20 grams of cocaine and if he sells an '8 ball' to Habib for 320 and 2 grams to Rangi for $85 per gram. What is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?
Question Three:
Junior is pimping for three girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Tasi can support his $800 a day crack habit?
Question Four:
Kani wants to cut his 1/4 Kg of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many grams of cut will he need?
Question Five:
Whetu gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Commodore and $100 for a Ford. If he has stolen 2 BMW's and 3 Fords, how many Commodores will he have to steal to make the $1,000 required for his new subwoofers to go in the WRX?
Question Six:
Sonny is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his de facto wife is spending $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out of prison, and how many years will he get for killing the stupid bitch for spending his money?
Question Seven:
If the average spray can covers 22 feet and the average letter is 8 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray with 3 paint cans?
Question Eight:
Kepa knocked up 6 girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in his gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Kepa knocked up?
Question Nine:
How many eyebrows does Hepi have?
Question Ten:
How many razors does Tonga who is now 24 and in the eleventh grade, need to use for his face and back, if every year he has had to use 7 more razors than the last? He started shaving at 13 yrs of age with 9 shavers.
You have 4 days to complete this test. This is an open book test.
Good Luck...
Name:__________________ Gang:__________________
Question One:
Ofa has an AK-47 with a 40 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive-by shootings can he attend before he has to reload?
Question Two:
Setu has 20 grams of cocaine and if he sells an '8 ball' to Habib for 320 and 2 grams to Rangi for $85 per gram. What is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?
Question Three:
Junior is pimping for three girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Tasi can support his $800 a day crack habit?
Question Four:
Kani wants to cut his 1/4 Kg of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many grams of cut will he need?
Question Five:
Whetu gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Commodore and $100 for a Ford. If he has stolen 2 BMW's and 3 Fords, how many Commodores will he have to steal to make the $1,000 required for his new subwoofers to go in the WRX?
Question Six:
Sonny is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his de facto wife is spending $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out of prison, and how many years will he get for killing the stupid bitch for spending his money?
Question Seven:
If the average spray can covers 22 feet and the average letter is 8 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray with 3 paint cans?
Question Eight:
Kepa knocked up 6 girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in his gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Kepa knocked up?
Question Nine:
How many eyebrows does Hepi have?
Question Ten:
How many razors does Tonga who is now 24 and in the eleventh grade, need to use for his face and back, if every year he has had to use 7 more razors than the last? He started shaving at 13 yrs of age with 9 shavers.
You have 4 days to complete this test. This is an open book test.
Good Luck...
:: Sunday, February 06, 2005
Watch the birdie
Look at this picture, keep looking at it.
Let your eyes relax and you will see a giraffe appear in the picture...
Remember, be patient and don't take your eyes off it.
OK, so I'm bored. Humour me, dammit.
;-)
Let your eyes relax and you will see a giraffe appear in the picture...
Remember, be patient and don't take your eyes off it.
OK, so I'm bored. Humour me, dammit.
;-)
:: Saturday, February 05, 2005
Holy Holey
Hands up who hasn't heard of Tantric Sex.
Ok, then the rest of you clever cookies should do ok on the Spiritual Sex quiz.
Does being Spiritual make Tantric Sex fucking Spooky?
Ok, then the rest of you clever cookies should do ok on the Spiritual Sex quiz.
Does being Spiritual make Tantric Sex fucking Spooky?
:: Friday, February 04, 2005
The gang's all here
Well, here we are again, in a new home on the WorldWideWait.
And a "wait" is what it has become again, now I am back on blogger.
So, why are we here? Its really very simple.
When I get the bums rush from my job at the end of March, I will have lost my free web hosting. And, as I am going to go bankrupt without the income, I better not hasten the fact by paying for domain name hosting to replace it. So, after 4 years, I will kiss goodbye the last of the baby steps I made to self sufficiency and not bludge off society and wave ta-ra to the career that was going to at least repay my (still 9K) student loan and maybe pay us more then $375 to live off in the hand each week.
Oh yeah, MS already did that.
Screwed on all fronts, huh. You have no idea how screwed.
Can you hear that? That's the fading echo of the final scream of a dying dream. Or the world's smallest violin playing my song. Shit I hate violins.
Must be a violin; it screeches like a scalded cat.
And a "wait" is what it has become again, now I am back on blogger.
So, why are we here? Its really very simple.
When I get the bums rush from my job at the end of March, I will have lost my free web hosting. And, as I am going to go bankrupt without the income, I better not hasten the fact by paying for domain name hosting to replace it. So, after 4 years, I will kiss goodbye the last of the baby steps I made to self sufficiency and not bludge off society and wave ta-ra to the career that was going to at least repay my (still 9K) student loan and maybe pay us more then $375 to live off in the hand each week.
Oh yeah, MS already did that.
Screwed on all fronts, huh. You have no idea how screwed.
Can you hear that? That's the fading echo of the final scream of a dying dream. Or the world's smallest violin playing my song. Shit I hate violins.
Must be a violin; it screeches like a scalded cat.
Rudeness
I dislike people who cannot say "thank you".
They piss me right off.
I was sent on a wild goose chase all over the server for two hours yesterday morning, and all for nothing. It seems someone didn't wait until he knew what the problem was before yelling for help.
And he couldn't even be bothered to say thank you.
That's not very nice, is it?
They piss me right off.
I was sent on a wild goose chase all over the server for two hours yesterday morning, and all for nothing. It seems someone didn't wait until he knew what the problem was before yelling for help.
And he couldn't even be bothered to say thank you.
That's not very nice, is it?
:: Thursday, February 03, 2005
Rules to live by
* Don’t trust people. Ever.
* Don’t do things for people, they only shit all over you when they have scabbed everything they can off you.
* Don’t put all your eggs in a basket lacking a handle with integrity.
* Don’t expect people to be understanding or accomodating when it’s not their selfish ass on the line.
* Don’t assume that because you are honest, trustworthy or reliable that the pricks you work for or share your life with will be too. They won’t. Overfed, overpaid, selfish, unethical, unfaithful and disloyal arseholes will always be overfed, overpaid, selfish, unethical, unfaithful and disloyal arseholes.
* It doesn’t matter how many years you spend doing for free, out of the goodness of your heart and the friendship you have the shit that others can’t, won’t or don’t know how to do, the minute they have to pay you anything your time, your time is almost up.
Karma... it's gonna get 'em.
* Don’t do things for people, they only shit all over you when they have scabbed everything they can off you.
* Don’t put all your eggs in a basket lacking a handle with integrity.
* Don’t expect people to be understanding or accomodating when it’s not their selfish ass on the line.
* Don’t assume that because you are honest, trustworthy or reliable that the pricks you work for or share your life with will be too. They won’t. Overfed, overpaid, selfish, unethical, unfaithful and disloyal arseholes will always be overfed, overpaid, selfish, unethical, unfaithful and disloyal arseholes.
* It doesn’t matter how many years you spend doing for free, out of the goodness of your heart and the friendship you have the shit that others can’t, won’t or don’t know how to do, the minute they have to pay you anything your time, your time is almost up.
Karma... it's gonna get 'em.
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Some content included in this site has been liberated at (and from) great peril from the internet. Where possible, credit or a link has been given or is marked as "Unknown", except for jokes - I don't make up jokes. All other content comes straight from the Brain of Moi. I reserve the right to retain ownership of my own drivel :-)
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